Hot damn do I love mini-golf. Last night my friends took me mini-golfing and thanks to the jello shots and tequila shots in my system I was able to win. Alcohol helps my handicap. However, this was a very serious course which leads me to this post:
The Top Ten things that last night’s Putt Putt course was missing:
10. A Giant ass T-Rex
The Top Ten things that last night’s Putt Putt course was missing:
10. A Giant ass T-Rex
This is for nostalgia purposes, a personal thing. There was this course by where I lived AND a course outside Boston that both had a huge ass orange T-Rex for no freaking reason. I mean, the hole was just straight with a T-Rex standing over it. If you hit the ball straight you would get a hole in one. Completely pointless and I love it.
9. A strangely puce colored ball that you have no idea how it got to be that color so you HAVE to take it. Although, they did have black balls at this course.
You know what I’m talking about. You immediately regret picking this ball within 3 holes.
8. A hole that was wayyyyy too long and took forever to play and that if the course had been crowded would have bottlenecked like crazy causing us to do stupid shit like use our golf clubs as ninja weapons causing someone to get hurt which I actually did anyway last night when there were no people on the course
7. More holes where you shoot it in the first hole and then it goes down a tube to the actual hole which is on a different tier.
These are totally awesome. The best are the ones that have multiple subholes to choose from. You just never know where the ball is gonna end up!
6. An 18th hole that either lets you shoot it into the clowns mouth for a free game or at the very least sucks your ball down.
This is necessary so that when I play with my brother, and we tie, he will get really pissed that we can’t have a playoff hole to determine the actual winner.
5. Those mats that have the 3 holes on them at the start of each hole which really serve no purpose because you just pick the center hole every time.
Ok, maybe in rare instances do you choose the left or right hand hole.
4. A Theme
OK there was this totally awesome mini golf course in Lake George, NY that had an around the world course that was 18 holes and an around America course. It was totally sweet, had an Egypt hole, France, etc. Pirate’s Cove also does a good job with this.
3. Holes where your ball can go in the water and you have to use that huge ass pole to fish your ball out and almost fall in during the process
The best is when your friend DOES fall in hehehehehehe. See: alcohol.
2. Signs at every hole talking about Pirate Adventures or some shit like that
The alcohol, combined with the lack of signs last night, cause me to never have any clue what hole I was on. Come on! What if this is the hole about the CURSE OF REDBEARD THE PIRATE! Build the suspense! See: Pirate’s Cove again.
1. A Windmill
The staple of every trashy putt putt in America.
9. A strangely puce colored ball that you have no idea how it got to be that color so you HAVE to take it. Although, they did have black balls at this course.
You know what I’m talking about. You immediately regret picking this ball within 3 holes.
8. A hole that was wayyyyy too long and took forever to play and that if the course had been crowded would have bottlenecked like crazy causing us to do stupid shit like use our golf clubs as ninja weapons causing someone to get hurt which I actually did anyway last night when there were no people on the course
7. More holes where you shoot it in the first hole and then it goes down a tube to the actual hole which is on a different tier.
These are totally awesome. The best are the ones that have multiple subholes to choose from. You just never know where the ball is gonna end up!
6. An 18th hole that either lets you shoot it into the clowns mouth for a free game or at the very least sucks your ball down.
This is necessary so that when I play with my brother, and we tie, he will get really pissed that we can’t have a playoff hole to determine the actual winner.
5. Those mats that have the 3 holes on them at the start of each hole which really serve no purpose because you just pick the center hole every time.
Ok, maybe in rare instances do you choose the left or right hand hole.
4. A Theme
OK there was this totally awesome mini golf course in Lake George, NY that had an around the world course that was 18 holes and an around America course. It was totally sweet, had an Egypt hole, France, etc. Pirate’s Cove also does a good job with this.
3. Holes where your ball can go in the water and you have to use that huge ass pole to fish your ball out and almost fall in during the process
The best is when your friend DOES fall in hehehehehehe. See: alcohol.
2. Signs at every hole talking about Pirate Adventures or some shit like that
The alcohol, combined with the lack of signs last night, cause me to never have any clue what hole I was on. Come on! What if this is the hole about the CURSE OF REDBEARD THE PIRATE! Build the suspense! See: Pirate’s Cove again.
1. A Windmill
The staple of every trashy putt putt in America.
3 comments:
right on havok!
ROAD TRIP TO THE DELLS! that way, we can also enjoy another favorite childhood indulgence of mine: WATER SLIDESSSSSSS!
Good brief and this fill someone in on helped me alot in my college assignement. Say thank you you for your information.
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